SHOULD I STAY IN LOVE WITH THIS AQUARIUS MAN....

[~Sweet~]

I don't even know if I will get a response to this but I am a sun taurus woman and just got out of a unexpectedly "short" relationship with a sun aquarius man. My story is somewhat long but to make it short...the aqua knew I wasn't interested in him at first because of the cold shoulder I gave him repeatedly (mostly because of past relationship issues). I didn't want anything to do with him especially since he planned on moving out of state. I offered to be a friend to him because long distance usually don't work...but oh no...he was sooo convinced he'd prove me wrong and assured me he would do all he could to make it work...somehow with his constant pursuing, reassurance with actions that matched his words, and intelligence...I opened up and let him in and my guard dropped. He was soooo infatuated so in love and even said he loved me. Told all his friends he found the one...his family...took me over to meet his parents...the whole nine. He would call so many times throughout the day or beg to see me...and when we did see each other it was 1st class all the way. He is by far the most amazing man I have ever met. Keep in mind...he was all of that when he was home. As soon as he left town not even a full two weeks later...all of that came to a screeching hault after he accused me of having horrible communication with him (mind you he is the one who became distant in communication while he was already HUNDREDS of miles away). Why go through all of that effort to break my guard down and tell the world you love me just to become a coldhearted distant short with words baffoon. He promised he wouldn't hurt me knowing what I've been through. I don't get it! He could of became an ass back home! He had the nerve to say to me "I wish things were different between us, I do love you and I'll c u around, maybe it might be different", and I may get a phone call or text from him every let's say 2-3 days. What am I suppose to do with that? He is VERY STUBBORN, is ALWAYS right even when he KNOWS for a fact he's wrong. The taurus I am, I can be just as stubborn so talkin to him and he talkin to me was like 2 bricks facing each other. I'm willing to compromise but mr aqua wouldn't compromise if it saved his life. If I mention anything emotional even now, NO RESPONSE..DEAD SILENCE..NADA! Was it all MIND GAMES? I'm so confused and would appreciate some input. He was so perfect and attentive to my needs and it all changed the moment he left and no doubt probably ran into temptation. What we had was what I and everyone who knew us thought was the perfect relationship. We were super compatible...I mean extremely compatible. How can he just walk away from that and appear to not be lookin back? 2 bad for me I now have to try to get over this otherwise perfect gentleman that entered n2 my life and I will but is he worth sticking around for... help please

[Donna]

Melanie:

He will be back. Mine just made an appearance on Fathers day. It's been a month. Did I ever mention that Aquarius are telepathic. Ask onewordspoken he'll tell you it's true. Seriously! Well Melanie, I am going to just play cool, give him his long rope and just go about my business like I've been doing. And you just need to do the same. They always come back...

[Melanie]

I am keeping my fingers crossed Donna.....but am very sceptic this time! He is the very strict type and everytime I overdo it with my mouthiness he punishes me for months on end....

Besides, yesterday I wished him a Bon Voyage as he was travelling from China back to his home country Italy and he did not even bother to reply to my message :(

God all mighty would forgive me much sooner than he.....

[Onewordspoken]

Alas....we are telepathic.

Sometimes telepathetic. Depends who you ask, and at what time.

Whats funny is Aquarius's can "sense" other peoples dis-comforts and even the "feel" in the room, or in a person of all things. I've read that on numerous sites. And I can tell you it's true.

[~Sweet~]

The irony of it all tickles me lol. Aquarius's can "sense" and "feel" discomforts, uneasiness, anything "emotional" in "others" but somehow just can't turn the telepathicness (for lack of a better word) "inward" to themselves. Hmmmm.....

[Melanie]

Interesting notion actually! Maybe because aqua doesn't give a damn about doing any inward juggling.....maybe it scares him to death to figure out whether he has any real emotions or not.....who knows???

I think they are just oblivious.......

[Angeline Elise]

But even the bad things somehow, I was unable to communicate. She swore I didn't even care. How? Is what went through my head. How in the hell could she not see it was killing me? I've never been able to answer that question. Therefore, perhaps I am a poor person to ask that question to. But I tried to answer it anyway. lol. -Onewordspoken

Heres the thing, Aqua people can be what I call "Emotionally Retarded" my friends stand in awe as I seemingly make the same mistakes over and over again when I can't communicate my feelings or when anyone else might understand what they are about to say is hurtful or inconsiderate of feelings...I blank out and just say it anyway. It makes me wonder if I am mildly autistic or something....ugh!! Words.....Can't.....Come.....Out.......GGAAHH!!

My friends say "Angeline...you are so smart, capable, and independent...but when it comes to relationships...you are like a blind bull!!"

We can be. We really, really can be. Sorry ;(

-A. (Moon/Venus/Mars/Juno Aqua.)

[Onewordspoken]

Meh

[Melanie]

Onewordspoken, you seem to have all the right answers to all of our questions....I wish you could answer my question; why would aqua men want to come back if the relationship is not suitable for him? if he wants casual and the other party wants more? or seems to want more??

I have done all the wrong things with aqua men, I told him I love him, I pressured him, I sent him an overdose of emails and messages, I told him to bugger off when he hurt my feelings and so on and so forth....and yet he kept coming. However it was clear to me that all I was offering him was not his piece of cake.....as he ran away everytime I got a bit emotional or overdid it with compliments, emails or messages.....so??

This is all very confusing to me.....

[Onewordspoken]

"why would aqua men want to come back if the relationship is not suitable for him?"

Answer: Which relationship?

I know I answered a question with a question. Aqua's guard their friendships. There have been girls I was with who were WAY more into me than I was into them. I played along with it for a time, because they were such cool people. And they made it seem like it was a "girlfriend-boyfriend" relationship or nothing at all.

So I played along with that. Eventually I would come to notice this as just a delay to the inevitable. And i'd end it. So which relationship is not his cup of tea? Your friendship? Or your love relationship?

There are also aquarius mindsets. You see, I have no idea what I'll do from moment to moment. When someone asks, "what would you do in this situation?".Especially if it's an emotionally charged situation, i'd be guessing at best. I have no idea what i'd do. This gives me the sense that I don't know myself. And causes a lot of self-inspection. This happens in a relationship too. Things come up, or we are presented with a challenge, with another person, and we have to figure out what our response to that will be. Sometimes it takes awhile. And sometimes we decide it isn't worth the attention required to find out, as perhaps we have another "shiny thing" keeping our attention.

And lastly we're masochists. (Not really, but it seemed appropriate.) Sometimes those moments of self-realization are worth it to be somewhere or with someone you shouldn't be. You must think of aquarius's like dolphins. Playful and kind of carefree. But they are (given enough time) looking for their life mate. Sometimes they find them....sometimes they run them off. lol. And sometimes they are just enjoying the present moment.

Aquarius's like to change things up....so even if you "figured it out" he'd know and everything would change.

My advice? Be yourself. Find out who YOU are. Let him decide what his "piece of cake" is. Let him know when he skrews up. Don't let him get away with demeaning you. (if he does) Demand self-respect. But let him have his long leash. If he betrays you, then leave him. And let him know you will too.

The long and short of it is this: If he wants you, he'll come back around. You got to decide if thats as a friend....or as a lover. Making love to you does not mean he wants to be committed to you. Ask him. Be direct. And make sure if you ask a "yes" or "no" question you get a "yes" or "no" answer.

You sound like a lot of fun. Im not sure why he'd choose to stay away. Good luck to you.

[Donna]

Onewordspoken:

Wow! You just reminded why I keep dealing with Aquarius men. You just gave this Gemini a whole new perspective into the Aquarius Phychie. But what if I just want to be friends and nothing more? If he dosent have the time to be anything but casual, why when I tell him lets just be friends, He says "NO! "It's way past that." But the past several months he treats me like Im just a casual aquaintence. No personal attention, just phone calls and text messages. Very in-personal, very un-involved. I think he has something shinney and just wants me for the security of knowing that he has someone. What do you think about that? He absolutly wont just be friends, it's like pretending there is more then what there is.

I want to keep this guy in my life but only as a friend because he dosent make the time for us he is always everywhere else. Why do aquarius men put their so called wifees on the back burner. It is what it is! Why pretend? Or is it because I want to just be casual that he dosent? Maybe if I acted very clingy and gushed with commitment and emotion he'd run like hell. The harder I pull away the tighter his grip gets. And we have constant struggles. When alls he has to do is agree to just be friends and stop expecting things you get from a solid commitment or from your wife.

Help me understand this. We are going to lose an amazing connection if him and I do not find balance. And I am the only female he has ever been involved with that knows him and will except his ways. Provided I don't have to be involved also. We vibe on the same mental frequency. He is like the male version of me minus the emotion. Which I cant stand by the way. (Emotions) I have no clue what to do with them!!! Help me

[Angeline Elise]

And sometimes we decide it isn't worth the attention required to find out, as perhaps we have another "shiny thing" keeping our attention.

Or Jangly. Haha.

My advice? Be yourself. Find out who YOU are. Let him decide what his "piece of cake" is. Let him know when he screws up. Don't let him get away with demeaning you, if he does. Demand self-respect but let him have his long leash. If he betrays you, then leave him. Let him know you will, too!

A- Advice (You misspelled 'screws'. I fixed it...and some other things)

A.
(Not A Virgo But Trying)

[Donna]

Angeline Elise,

I love the cartoon, you just made me smile. Thank You!