Libra says to Taurus: "You're too possessive!" How to react?

[dormboyph]

How do i deal with this. My libra partner told me that I am too possessive. And that i should give her freedom .

If you are a Libran, what kind of treatment would you like to have from us Taurus? I tried giving a space before to my ex-Libran lover but Taurians are not good with this. Our nature is to be possessive. So, my relationship with her ended. She felt i don't care at all. :(

[Maria]

Well, taurus or not, it sucks to be with a possesive guy!!! Im an aries with taurus moon.
I know its in your character to be possesive you feel, but just try to understand.. What a girl hates most or tries to escape sometimes, is the attention or rules she had once from her father..As a woman now or trying to be a woman in the relationship, what she won't want to deal with in a grown man, as a grown woman, is having to be a little girl all over again, under some man's possesive rules or such.. She already went through childhood once it doesnt have to happen again. Its just- NO!
While some girls might say that they like to be dominated or something to that extent, really there's a lot of girls who'd feel most alive and in love when theyre allowed to be themselves.. Having a possesive mate might make them feel like theyre being watched or judged.. and theyll always have to watch what they do or say, otherwise the guy will get protective and mad or dissaprove.. Its almost impossible to feel love and be happy like that..
Although it might seem to work for some people, for a short period of time though.. i dont think anybody wants to be like that forever.. at some point youve got to learn to trust and relax.
There's a difference between being a gentleman and being possesive to a lady!!
I dont know if it's that certain people tend to think that girls need to be watched over more, while boys get to run around and do whatever.. but seriously girls bore of that whole misconception and itd be nice to have a guy who allows her to be wild, unbridled, and herself.. and regard or protect her honor as a lady of course. if she needs or requests. a lot of times possesive guys dont allow you to be like that for some reason. im just generalizing though.
if you still cant understand why or how to be balanced, heres an example that might hit the spot..
wouldnt you have sometimes preferred that someone (like a parent maybe) give you space, that theyd just have trust and faith in you as a person?.. instead of just hovering and worrying about you so much?? it's almost a mood killer sometimes.. I mean, you want space and to be regarded as an adult don't you? Females arent very different in that respect!!!
Im not sure what part of "possesive" your libra girlfriend had a problem with, but i just answered the question to the best of my abilities hope it helped!!!

[dormboyph]

thanks maria, it was an eye opener for me. i will try my best to be balanced. sigh. i tried it on my current relationship but i failed again. Just today, i received a text message from her, like from from my exes, she was complaining about my behavior which is being possessive.

[dormboyph]

"if you still cant understand why or how to be balanced"

-- I just want to react on this statement :D

For me, or for us, being possessive is the right one. I mean, we believe that if you really love a person, you SHOULD always want him/her to be with you, either by text, email, call, etc. THERE IS NO BUSY HOURS! You should always find time. And if you don't do this, you don't love us. You should always think of us. You shouldn't be able to eat well if you haven't text us yet or hear our voice. That is our expectation, and that is what we are, and what we do to you :(

.. but only few can do this... not even Libra.. cuz they are damn flirt! oh well.. sorry i got carried away :P

[BabyTaurus]

I struggle with my possessiveness too, with both friends and lovers and family! It's such a burden to feel this way and probably one for them too.
We have to learn to understand that people need their space and that they cant ALWAYS tend to us

I know I have feelings for someone when I start getting possessive and wanting them all to myself. It's not that I want them around ALL the time because if they were constantly in my face then i would get annoyed. They need to make me feel secure enough to know that even when they don't message everything is okay but care and love me enough to do it because they love me.

I dont need them EVERY hour if I feel secure, are you secure?

[dormboyph]

What do you mean by security? Is it after all that she does , after all the flirts you are sure that she will come back to you at night?

[Maria]

oh i see!!! you want attention and to be thought of like that!!
i wouldve thought that libras loooove that relationship etiquette. they love being a partner, i thought?
well if you look at libra kim kardashian, she was very lovey about reggie but their first time around she was kind of being too into her career or not making enough time for reggie and his games.. if you follow that stuff, it was kind of like that.. nowadays i think kim realized theres more to be put into a relationship.. i dont know reggies sign?ah ok he is pisces.
well ok.. i think as a girl i can say, i thikn id give a guy more "thoughtfulness" if he just lasy back and gives me the chance to come around.. if the guy is very lovey all the time, it might take away from my opportunities to make an effort. you know? sometimes women go for the assholes cuz thye like the little boy they get to nurture type thing. it makes them like mommas. but then maybe when they have a kid with those little boys they start to realize they need a man now, cuz theyve already got a couple of kids..
if you give those girls a nice guy NOW, theyl probably be like, not in the mood to love them or something.. cuz that guy is just so busy loving them and being nice to them, they barely get the chance to initiate or whatever and the momentum falls dead. its like similar to having a one sided conversation where one person does all the talking, the other starts to kinda drift off... so..
im not saying to be a bad guy to your girlfriends at all. dont even attempt "hard to get" cuz no one gets thats right anyways!! im just saying, maybe the girls you date need to decide to come around. maybe sometimes in the relationship. you need to kick back relax and let them choose and pursue- YOU! men pursue women all the time. here, there, on the street, everywhere.. it doesnt matter if and that youre even theyre boyfriend, the truth is that they tire from all the easy male attention they get.
do be nice and treat them like a lady though.. just to be sexy, maybe leave a little of it to them when it comes time to pursue or seduce you, sometimes they like that..
its not really about playing games either, its just some insight.
im sure there ar e some girls, you can shower them with lots of love and affection and they just cant get enough. those might be some very cute and loveable but rare types!! theyre not all like that always!!
well anyways.. i do agree, i would think it was abnormal if a person went around acting like as if they never think of us.. but then when i got older and lived together with my boyfriend, i began to see how some much needed space is important to growth and missing someone!!
I am an aries though.. libras are more the type who love to be adored, like nina said..
but, even kim kardashian wrote in her Cosmopolitan interview that was out just recently, she'd wrote that in a relationship, she tends to wear the pants in the relationship!! How funny. Reggie is Pisces, theyre kinda effeminate no? They're very assimilating and followers. they'd totally let you seduce them. theyre not too agressive or demanding?

[dormboyph]

Hi maria,

thanks for replying. i learned a lot.

[Maria]

I tried to add, that women sometimes like to do a little bit of work to get a man.. It's something or part of the "hunt," that makes them feel sexy.. As opposed to when men hunt, it can be like noooo get away!! (you see that happening sometimes.) It really does make a woman feel sexy when they can do that.
If a guy is a gentleman upon first approach, like he acts like he doesnt have a penis or ulterior motive when first talking to a chick, then maybe a woman can enjoy being approached and not even realize or know that she is being "hunted.." This makes her feel safe or naturally comfortable with you.. and then maybe in their imaginations, they'd become something sensual like the femme fatale who's just begining to unravel her coils (sort of like an "undressing" kinda thing) and pursuing the guy she'd just met..
I can't picture many scenarios I'd followed up on in which I felt like I was the one being seduced, I do think I'd felt that on most occasions i was the one to "seduce" when first hooking up with the opposite sex, even though or if I was too shy to approach them sometimes. It's just about feeling sexy yknow, i would think that girls do this.

[Nina]

Umm speak of experience from a libra who dated few Taurus, The problem is Libra girl are socialite. We like talking and get stimuli by intelligent conversation and we love to talk with both men and women. And sometime this can make you feel like we are flirting. But not always the case. Libra just nice people in general. So if there is certain things she did that make you feel upset. You might want to let her know. The problem is she like to hear you like to see the action. Communication is the key, she will adjust for you but never ask her to change completely, she will get stubborn and not like that, See you need to show her what you feel by her action and not tell her (order) her what to do.

Do not give her too much space, she will fell you don’t care. Libra like to be adore and love. and we like to be in pair not alone. so if she choose to be with you she want to be with you. Give her some credit.

disappear for a week and send her text or little gift that you still think of her. Be romantic with a little bit of style, we like that and Taurus are good at that! For ex send her nice exotic flower not carnation we like one of a kind stuff .(I know taurus want to spen on good value, Libra spend on sensational and romance).

Good luck. I wish my Taurus are asking pp like you. May be I should ask for your advise as well hey

[dormboyph]

hi nina, thanks too!

I will do this: disappear for a week and send her text or little gift that you still think of her

it has been my style to "disappear" if i am not satisfied with the love that i get from a girl, or from any individual. I stop texting, i dont accept calls from them... as these happen it makes me feel that i'm important and that they can't live w/o me! :P It reduces the pain that i feel..

Yeah, feel free to ask me regarding any Taurus behavior. thanks again.

[Nina]

What do they want from their ex. my ex Taurus keep coming back. Do they want to use you just for sex for its the real deal? How can you tell? Taureans are so hard to read. I still like him but he was so immature (may be still is)

[dormboyph]

Ok, who ended the relationship? Is it you or him?

If the other party is the one who ended the relationship, taurus will keep on coming back. Because we feel that there is unfinished business. Remember, we are workaholics and goal oriented. It does not mean that we are after sex, it's the total relationship.

If the Taurus guy is the one who ended it:

Normally, once we already overcome the pain we do not want to come back again. We will forget you for life. So, if he is coming back that means he still loves you and he doesn't want to forget you. And when he loves you, he mean it, he loves you the Taurus way.