lol I feel the same way after meeting that guy but does that say anything about who you are? Like why don't we like someone who is like us? After meeting that guy it kinda made me feel as if I hope I'm not actually come across to people like he came across to me cos I didn't like it but I wouldn't want to make anyone feel how he made me feel and hopefully I don't.
His birthday was like one day away from mine. I was amazed. He was quite attractive, but I couldn't bring myself to trust him. I like to protect myself, so if I get the feeling I'm being lied to, I run. I never dated him, but if I thought I could trust him, then maybe I would have.
No but if I did I think we would have fun but it wouldn't work because we would be busy leaving eachother behind for other ideas we have in our heads. But we would try to contact each other every year from now. Because I am an Aquarius it would be hard for us to be with one another.
he understood me like no one else ever could at the time...past "understanding", we we're feeling each others emotions constantly...draining.
emotional dependency.
it was bad.... i needed him and he needed me.
in a drug addict kind of way.
but with this Addiction it wasn't "obsessive/control" it was a "need, medicine...not a medicine to make you feel better, but like without it you can not continue living.
i cant explain the feeling, where you put your whole existence on One person.
the night ill always remember, he got drunk (drowns emotions in alcohol)
hooked up with another girl, came home dropped to his knees and cried to me for hours on how he was sorry, how could i love him. you cant love me you cant love this.
its like he wanted me to help him (not leave him) yet knew that his actions weren't gonna change...
not in a refusal to change, but other influences are stronger than anything he possesses.
he knew he wasn't strong enough to resist temptation, and saw himself "unworthy" for me to love him.
i see sometimes the link pisces with Christianity, and this had that kind of feel.
Saving someone, being Saved, and feeling if you think your worthy or not.
he really wanted to be saved.
i could see in his eyes.
he stares at you as if pleading for something in you that could save him.
ive known an Aqua sun who had his venus/mars in pisces who would give me the same stare.
i've felt this before too, ive done those same things and
seeing this in another person is what terrified me the most.
it was a mirror, showed me everything, all the flaws i had that i've ignored.
and im just Now realizing that i was suppose to meet him.
it was supposed to happen. i needed him to show me what i needed to change.
i learned alot.
but never again.
ive changed.
thats the past.
and never again.